flame
(Monday, February 23, 2009/10:50 PM)
i forgot about this.
one of the epics that happened only after we parted ways.
(although i'd like to think we haven't really yet done so)
but it makes us value this all the more so.
so just let it stay.
a little longer like this.
and all will be well.
On a sleepless night
I sigh all alone
How’s everyone?
I feel kind of lonely
That’s not like me
So stop laughing
It’s just that I don’t know
My true self
Into the broad earth, a single seed
Extended its roots
And bore fruit that was still unripe
The fruit wants to hurry up
And turn orange-colored
Basking in your light
My ideals and dreams only expand
Notice me, hey
I tried to eat
An orange today, too
But it was still sour and I cried
Because it’s unlike me to leave any behind
I ate it all
I loved it; I felt like crying
I loved it; I loved it
Even if they’re similar, they’re different
Mandarins and oranges
Friends and lovers
And our two hearts, too
I didn’t want to get hurt
So I fled
When I did that, not even light
Would shine upon me
They’re miracles, right?
Encounters and love
Seeds and buds
Even for the fruit that was still unripe
The color orange makes me recall
The sunset glow that I saw
On that day
It seemed as if our two shadows
Held hands together
I wondered if the oranges
Would turn sweet someday
Or would they wither?
I didn’t want to learn of my future
So I ate it all
It was sour…
I loved it, but I felt like crying
I loved it, so I felt like crying
The fruit wants to hurry up
And turn orange-colored
Basking in your light
My ideals and dreams only expand
Notice me, hey
I tried to eat
An orange today, too
But again, it was sour and I cried
Because it’s unlike me to leave any behind
I ate it all; I loved it
I felt like crying; I loved it
I loved it
I loved it; so sour
I felt like crying; I loved it
なけると。
好きだよ。
bow
(Sunday, February 22, 2009/8:37 PM)
because this will become very relevant in the near future.
well the movie.
it was good.
life is that cruel.
and it showed that well.
very.
very well.
because there is always.
a sacrifice for a greater good.
and the good gets greater.
and the goods before it sacrificed for it.
so know that.
no matter how great the price.
it is what one will do.
to chase after his destiny.
because destiny won't come to you.
and instead it will be you.
you who will run towards it.
darkness
(Monday, February 16, 2009/9:39 PM)
...
because i don't feel like writing anything else.
Love of mine some day you will die
But I'll be close behind
I'll follow you into the dark
No blinding light or tunnels to gates of white
Just our hands clasped so tight
Waiting for the hint of a spark
If heaven and hell decide
That they both are satisfied
Illuminate the no's on their vacancy signs
If there's no one beside you
When your soul embarks
Then I'll follow you into the dark
In Catholic school as vicious as Roman rule
I got my knuckles bruised by a lady in black
And I held my tongue as she told me
"Son fear is the heart of love"
So I never went back
If heaven and hell decide
That they both are satisfied
Illuminate the no's on their vacancy signs
If there's no one beside you
When your soul embarks
Then I'll follow you into the dark
You and me have seen everything to see
From Bangkok to Calgary
And the soles of your shoes are all worn down
The time for sleep is now
It's nothing to cry about
Cause we'll hold each other soon
The blackest of rooms
If heaven and hell decide
That they both are satisfied
Illuminate the no's on their vacancy signs
If there's no one beside you
When your soul embarks
Then I'll follow you into the dark
Then I'll follow you into the dark
because i don't feel like writing anything else.
Love of mine some day you will die
But I'll be close behind
I'll follow you into the dark
No blinding light or tunnels to gates of white
Just our hands clasped so tight
Waiting for the hint of a spark
If heaven and hell decide
That they both are satisfied
Illuminate the no's on their vacancy signs
If there's no one beside you
When your soul embarks
Then I'll follow you into the dark
In Catholic school as vicious as Roman rule
I got my knuckles bruised by a lady in black
And I held my tongue as she told me
"Son fear is the heart of love"
So I never went back
If heaven and hell decide
That they both are satisfied
Illuminate the no's on their vacancy signs
If there's no one beside you
When your soul embarks
Then I'll follow you into the dark
You and me have seen everything to see
From Bangkok to Calgary
And the soles of your shoes are all worn down
The time for sleep is now
It's nothing to cry about
Cause we'll hold each other soon
The blackest of rooms
If heaven and hell decide
That they both are satisfied
Illuminate the no's on their vacancy signs
If there's no one beside you
When your soul embarks
Then I'll follow you into the dark
Then I'll follow you into the dark
trigger
(Sunday, February 15, 2009/8:19 PM)
for there is this slight possibility.
that it might even end tomorrow.
for without material.
there is no power.
and without power.
you can't change anything.
and without change.
everything shall stay the same.
the same that you didn't wish for.
but my heart shall not waver.
i shall keep it still.
no matter how big the insecurity that may overshadow me.
i shall continue shining that light.
for with determination and a heart that never wavers.
i can.
and i will succeed.
my heart is not wavering.
i'm just thinking.
about how.
how to get out of this.
fighting so many times against fate.
and losing every single battle.
what are my chances now?
but i will still fight.
for when the one you hold dearest in your heart appears.
you will shout out.
and clash.
no matter how low the odds.
and no matter how it ends.
because you did it for her.
and then you will realise.
that it was fated from the start.
through
(Saturday, February 14, 2009/11:58 PM)
and.
one minute before.
everything is calm.
and everything is normal.
supposedly normal.
various ideas passing through.
none of them making sense at all.
it's the excitement.
and it's taking over me.
but hope nothing yet, child.
for there is still a long way to go.
and there is still a distance to walk.
so you shall continue.
and walk you will.
towards only one destination.
because without that destination.
your life will have no meaning.
and then with determination.
and a heart that never wavers.
you will reach that destination.
and then you can smile.
and it shall be returned.
and all will be well.
one minute before.
everything is calm.
and everything is normal.
supposedly normal.
various ideas passing through.
none of them making sense at all.
it's the excitement.
and it's taking over me.
but hope nothing yet, child.
for there is still a long way to go.
and there is still a distance to walk.
so you shall continue.
and walk you will.
towards only one destination.
because without that destination.
your life will have no meaning.
and then with determination.
and a heart that never wavers.
you will reach that destination.
and then you can smile.
and it shall be returned.
and all will be well.
vibe
(Friday, February 13, 2009/7:10 PM)
i too.
want inexpensive ramen to tide these times.
first week of class.
has been alright i suppose.
every day normal but this one.
with some logic, i figure out a lot of things.
that were once invisible to me.
now i only have one chance.
and this chance i shall use.
and i have to succeed.
because you don't normally get a second chance.
so you shouldn't fall back on it.
so perhaps.
this year.
might be the best one after all.
I walked you home most days
to beat the traffic after class
with all my best intentions.
But when the weather changed,
like fine print, you were hard to read.
Blind-folded, eyes wide open,
staring through me.
I never heard the words that were spoken,
with the rumored nights, with the rendezvous.
I never thought the whispers were true ‘til now…
I saw things that I shouldn’t have tonight, tonight.
I know now what I couldn’t have,
I’ve gone too far to turn it back
I’ve gone too far to turn it back
Followed you home halfway,
over the fence to your backyard,
with all my best intentions.
And through your window frame,
outstretched and lying on your bed,
Blind-folded, eyes wide open,
staring through me.
I never heard the words that were spoken,
with the rumored nights, with the rendezvous.
I never look at you like i used to now
I saw things that I shouldn’t have tonight, tonight.
I know now what I couldn’t have,
I’ve gone too far to turn it back
I’ve gone too far to turn it back
Uninvited, no one knows
how much I care, how bad you are,
How good we’d be, but you won’t let me in
Goodnight I’m leaving.
I never heard the words that were spoken,
with the rumored nights, with the rendezvous.
I never thought the whispers were true ‘til now…
I saw things that I shouldn’t have tonight, tonight.
I know now what I couldn’t have,
I’ve gone too far to turn it back
I saw things that I shouldn’t have tonight, tonight.
I know now what I couldn’t have,
I’ve gone too far to turn it back
I walked you home most days
I had the best intentions
I walked you home most days
I had the best intentions
I walked you home most days
step
(Thursday, February 12, 2009/9:48 PM)
reduced to ash.
well anyway.
what else to say.
hm.
the week's coming to an end.
i need to find a time to slot my homework in.
otherwise it'll be a new week before i even realise it.
well i'll find it somehow.
and then.
gathering notes and.
trading them around.
who knows how this will work.
well it will help.
as long as we believe in it.
and finally.
on sunday.
another ordinary sunday.
but with a link.
to the glorious past.
we shall live it again.
with much laughter.
for the sun rises to set.
and the moon is what's left of it.
won't you come by.
and watch the moon filled sky with me.
EDIT:
and i know what to get now.
i just need a pinch of timing.
and a bit of hope.
and that dream will come so very true.
almost there now.
with that chance presented to me.
by this extreme stroke of luck.
i will succeed.
moon
(Wednesday, February 11, 2009/9:43 PM)
more lyrics.
for there's nothing better to put.
slowly and surely.
day by day.
one step at a time.
all the way.
there we will go.
and there we will stand.
staring at the eclipsing moon.
whilst holding hands.
that is the fantasy.
To my surprise, and my delight
I saw sunrise, I saw sunlight
I am nothing in the dark
And the clouds burst to show daylight
Ooh and the sun will shine
Yeah on this heart of mine
Ooh and I realise
Who cannot live without
Ooh come apart without
On a hill top, on a sky-rise
Like a first born child
On a full day, and a full flight
Defeat darkness, breaking daylight
Ooh and the sun will shine
Yeah on this heart of mine
Ooh and I realise
Who cannot live without
Ooh come apart without
Daylight
Slowly breaking through the daylight
for there's nothing better to put.
slowly and surely.
day by day.
one step at a time.
all the way.
there we will go.
and there we will stand.
staring at the eclipsing moon.
whilst holding hands.
that is the fantasy.
To my surprise, and my delight
I saw sunrise, I saw sunlight
I am nothing in the dark
And the clouds burst to show daylight
Ooh and the sun will shine
Yeah on this heart of mine
Ooh and I realise
Who cannot live without
Ooh come apart without
On a hill top, on a sky-rise
Like a first born child
On a full day, and a full flight
Defeat darkness, breaking daylight
Ooh and the sun will shine
Yeah on this heart of mine
Ooh and I realise
Who cannot live without
Ooh come apart without
Daylight
Slowly breaking through the daylight
beginnings
(Monday, February 09, 2009/2:40 PM)
maybe i have been spamming too many song lyrics.
so that shall stop.
for now.
in the meantime.
i'll just find something to.
talk about.
school has been fine.
if you take today only.
not too bad.
it just doesn't stay the same.
for things change.
and other things will change with them.
people hate change.
but they are the very beings who.
created change itself.
after all.
it is because of change that.
we are here.
it is because of change.
that the world is.
in disaster and turmoil.
and it is because of change.
that we try.
to save it.
the calendar says my luck tomorrow is average.
average.
i guess that is what i am now.
but with a bit of change.
and hard work.
a lot of it.
then maybe the winds of fate.
will tear a crack open in the cave.
and a beam will shine through.
and then i'll walk.
walk the way out.
stop
(Sunday, February 08, 2009/3:54 PM)
realise in that a short time.
we will return back to normal again.
or what will be the normal.
in the majority's eyes.
And the hardest part
Was letting go not taking part
Was the hardest part
And the strangest thing
Was waiting for that bell to ring
It was the strangest start
I could feel it go down
Bittersweet I could taste in my mouth
Silver lining the clouds
Oh and I
I wish that I could work it out
And the hardest part
Was letting go not taking part
You really broke my heart, oh
And I tried to sing
But I couldn't think of anything
And that was the hardest part, oh, oh
I can feel it go down
You left the sweetest taste in my mouth
You're a silver lining the clouds
Oh and I
Oh and I
I wonder what it's all about
I wonder what it's all about
Everything I know, is, wrong
Everything I do
It just comes undone
And everything is torn apart
Oh and thats the hardest part
That's the hardest part
Yeah that's the hardest part
That's the hardest part.
we will return back to normal again.
or what will be the normal.
in the majority's eyes.
And the hardest part
Was letting go not taking part
Was the hardest part
And the strangest thing
Was waiting for that bell to ring
It was the strangest start
I could feel it go down
Bittersweet I could taste in my mouth
Silver lining the clouds
Oh and I
I wish that I could work it out
And the hardest part
Was letting go not taking part
You really broke my heart, oh
And I tried to sing
But I couldn't think of anything
And that was the hardest part, oh, oh
I can feel it go down
You left the sweetest taste in my mouth
You're a silver lining the clouds
Oh and I
Oh and I
I wonder what it's all about
I wonder what it's all about
Everything I know, is, wrong
Everything I do
It just comes undone
And everything is torn apart
Oh and thats the hardest part
That's the hardest part
Yeah that's the hardest part
That's the hardest part.
lining
(/12:22 AM)
and that is the end of the beginning.
for reality is cruel to those without talent.
but when one overcomes this lack of talent.
with hard, hard work.
then perhaps the sky will be filled.
with the light of the moon.
once again.
and when that ray of light.
pierces in through the pitch black darkness.
i will reach out.
and grab it.
on my first try.
and only.
on my first try.
for reality is cruel to those without talent.
but when one overcomes this lack of talent.
with hard, hard work.
then perhaps the sky will be filled.
with the light of the moon.
once again.
and when that ray of light.
pierces in through the pitch black darkness.
i will reach out.
and grab it.
on my first try.
and only.
on my first try.
ray
(Tuesday, February 03, 2009/9:53 AM)
today.
is the day of great rebellion.
where in the darkness.
one shall stand up.
and walk straight ahead.
not knowing what he might collide with.
but knowing that eventually.
no matter how bruised and injured he may become.
he will emerge out.
into the brilliant light.
and there he will stand.
and look at everything with awe.
for the effort was worth it.
and against all odds he made it.
such is the tribulation of this young man.
for today is the day he fights against his worst enemy.
who is none other than himself.
for in the pitch black surroundings.
where he cannot see his five fingers outstretched.
he will continue to walk.
for today is a day of rebellion.
and a final chance to seek something on higher ground.
just one more time.
one more chance.
is what he has got now.
and that chance he shall use.
with great effort and emotion.
he struggles on.
waiting for that moment.
where he'll come through.
for the light is the day that has gone past.
and the light is the sunrise that is approaching fast.
gone is the emotion of the previous day.
now hope is the only thing leading the way.
walk wherever he might and wherever he may.
the darkness shall always stand in his way.
but with determination and a heart that doesn't give up.
that darkness might relent soon enough.
and clear a path for him to move.
for a ray of light is shining through.
and towards that ray of light he'll go.
should he emerge what a sight to behold.
the sky is filled with the light of the moon.
and within it all that's happened so soon.
and there the man will stare with awe.
his heart will be still and filled one with song.
a song that has captured him through time.
with grace and tragedy it speaks a rhyme.
of love and a pure heart so clear.
that overrides any hate or fear.
and then he comes to realize.
it has been with him all the time.
and he shall treasure it in his heart from now.
for it is by this that he can bow.
and say a word of thanks.
for this is the last chance that he has.
and he shall use it.
is the day of great rebellion.
where in the darkness.
one shall stand up.
and walk straight ahead.
not knowing what he might collide with.
but knowing that eventually.
no matter how bruised and injured he may become.
he will emerge out.
into the brilliant light.
and there he will stand.
and look at everything with awe.
for the effort was worth it.
and against all odds he made it.
such is the tribulation of this young man.
for today is the day he fights against his worst enemy.
who is none other than himself.
for in the pitch black surroundings.
where he cannot see his five fingers outstretched.
he will continue to walk.
for today is a day of rebellion.
and a final chance to seek something on higher ground.
just one more time.
one more chance.
is what he has got now.
and that chance he shall use.
with great effort and emotion.
he struggles on.
waiting for that moment.
where he'll come through.
for the light is the day that has gone past.
and the light is the sunrise that is approaching fast.
gone is the emotion of the previous day.
now hope is the only thing leading the way.
walk wherever he might and wherever he may.
the darkness shall always stand in his way.
but with determination and a heart that doesn't give up.
that darkness might relent soon enough.
and clear a path for him to move.
for a ray of light is shining through.
and towards that ray of light he'll go.
should he emerge what a sight to behold.
the sky is filled with the light of the moon.
and within it all that's happened so soon.
and there the man will stare with awe.
his heart will be still and filled one with song.
a song that has captured him through time.
with grace and tragedy it speaks a rhyme.
of love and a pure heart so clear.
that overrides any hate or fear.
and then he comes to realize.
it has been with him all the time.
and he shall treasure it in his heart from now.
for it is by this that he can bow.
and say a word of thanks.
for this is the last chance that he has.
and he shall use it.